Wednesday, June 20, 2012
On Caulk and Chalk
Man, English is hard, but it’s hardest on the little ones. Bub recently discovered a new way to dawdle away hazy summer afternoons: sidewalk chalk. Harmless, washable, non-toxic multi-colored sidewalk chalk.
Only problem is his pronunciation hasn’t quite caught up to his newfangled artistic vision. In his defense, the ‘ch’ is a late-bloomer in the vast field of English phonetics, whereas the hard ‘c’ comes quite easily. And that makes for some funny-funny.
Here are some excerpts from today’s sidewalk adventure, written as Bub believes he said/heard them, not necessarily how they were actually delivered:
1. Daddy: Bub, what’s that in your hand?
Bub: (with a small jump) Chalk!
2. Daddy: Ooh, Bub, what color is your chalk?
3. Mommy: Bub, get that chalk out of your mouth!
4. Daddy: Oh, Bub, you’ve got chalk all over your face.
5. Mommy: Bub, please brush the chalk off your pants.
6. Mommy: No, we do not use our chalk on the front porch.
7. Mommy: Why don’t you give Daddy your chalk?
8. Daddy: Why don’t we try one chalk at a time, Bub?
9. Bub: More.
Daddy: Oh, you want some more juice?
Bub: No, chalk!
10. Mommy: (in song) Chalk away, chalk away, it’s time to put our chalk away.
11. Daddy: C’mon, Bub. Put your chalk in the box with the others.